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Woman Asks If She’s A Jerk for Not Playing Mom With Her Ex’s Affair Baby

Cheating is an incredibly tough and painful experience to go through. Today’s story is about a wife who got cheated on and divorced her husband. Her ex-husband had a baby during his affair and the other woman passed away.

The Story
Reddit user, Honest-Wish7885, shared her painful and difficult story on AITA (Am I the A**hole?) to ask whether she’s being a jerk for not wanting to take care of her ex’s affair baby. She wrote:

“My ex-husband and I divorced four years ago because he cheated. He had an affair baby (Juniper, 3yoF) with the other woman but Juniper’s mom passed away when she was 1yo. Aside from my ex-husband and his family, she doesn’t have anyone else because her mom grew in the system.”

“He and I have 4 kids (Joshua 20M, Cassidy16F, Nate 11M and Jacob 8M), when we divorced Joshua cut him off and Cassidy followed him soon after, they don’t visit him anymore and has never met Juniper, he has always blamed me for that because ‘I kept his children away’, he might be an awful husband and partner, but he’s an awesome dad, I’ll give him that much.”

“Nate and Jacob still visits him and are close with his baby, I tried once to take the three of them out when she was younger but it wasn’t for me, I know she’s blameless but I can’t separate her from my ex’s betrayal, so know every time I pick Nate and Jacob up I try not to engage much. If she says hi, I say hi back, if she waves, I do too, but nothing more.”

“Now, every time I pick them up, she starts to mumble ‘mama, mama’, I’ve tell her things like ‘No Juniper, I’m not your mom’, ‘Call me [my name], I’m fine with that’, las time she actually ran at me calling me mama and began to cry when I didn’t pick her up and took her with me. Listen, I don’t think my ex is telling her to call me mom, but that’s how Nate and Jacob acts (specially Jacob, he runs at me saying ‘mom! mom!’ and hugs me, so I guess she’s copying his behavior). Yesterday my sons spent Easter with my ex’s family, and Juniper ran at me again, I said hi and my ex asked for a second which I said yes.”

“He basically told me that seeing me picking the boys up, being affectionate and loving with them is confusing and hurting Juniper, she’s a baby and she doesn’t understand what’s happening, so he asked me if I could just take her with me for a few days like I do with the boys and maybe, over the time, let her call me mom. I said absolutely no, that I’m sorry for Juniper, but that I won’t be playing mom with her and that I’m only keeping a relationship with both of them because of our son’s. He called me heartless and pointed out how she cries when I leave without her but I said that it wasn’t my problem and that he should deal with that. He later sent a video of Juniper crying by the door and said ‘I hope you’re happy’ so.. AITA? I mean I know it’s not her fault, but isn’t mine either.”

Everyone on Reddit supported her for what she’s doing. For context, NTA means “Not the A**hole.” Here are some of the top comments:

JennieSimms said:

“It’s a shame you can’t divorce him twice.”

Lacroix24601 wrote:

“NTA. Your ex has his own special seat in hell for his manipulation of this situation. Yes, the child is blameless but your ex made his bed, now he gets to lie in it. And I’ll bet 100 Reddit dollars that he doesn’t actually GAF about ‘how sad Juniper is’, he just wants a break from being a full time parent and is trying to weasel that break from you.”

Awkward-Wasabi-9262 commented:

“NTA but there is another, simpler solution here. Let him pick up and drop off his sons while someone watches Juniper at home. Poor little girl. My heart goes out to her. But it also goes out to you, OP. This isn’t a mess of your making. No reason for anyone to stick the broom and dustpan in your hand for the clean up”

This post has over 3000 comments at the time of writing this article, you can read them on Reddit here.

Our Take
Definitely NTA. We’re very saddened by the little girl’s situation because she’s innocent in this entire ordeal but it’s also not this woman’s duty to fake being a mother when she doesn’t want to.

What’s Your Take?
What’s your take on this woman’s story? Share your take in the comments below.

Source: Reddit

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